Recently, when working through some old trauma, again, I had that pervasive thought of "I've already done this work. Why is this still coming up? When am I going to be done with this? I'm so over dealing with this."
Sentiments such as this one I have heard many times with the people I work with as well. It's common for us to wish that finally this time we have done the integration piece we need; we can heal once and for all and get on with our lives.
However, we are not the same person dealing with the same trauma. We are continuously growing and evolving and changing.
Each time painful experiences resurface for healing we have an opportunity to harvest fresh insights from that experience. In the game of transformation, we are constantly becoming new again. With every rebirth, after the contractions, we are invited to reflect with fresh eyes.
Greeting the newness, I remind myself: I am not dealing with the same old story again; I am a different person now that is able to look back and integrate new aspects of that trauma. I have a greater capacity to tolerate the rage, grief and pain as I grow and to let fresh insights emerge. I have more tools and resources than I once did.
It is a privilege to do this shadow work. Many people do not have the luxury or support to go there. Because we are all interconnected, our inner work ripples into the fabric of our culture, creating new possibilities as we unlearn old ways and embark upon trailblazing new pathways in consciousness.
Each time we dive down into the underworld to do that process of loving, forgiving and holding we are transforming the experience not only for ourselves but for our ancestors, our children, and for the collective.
Have you noticed a new self emerging in the shedding of old pain? Do tell in the comments below.